Friday, May 4, 2007

make a move

I think when you buy stuff to run, you feel compelled to run. Got my Nano an armband and ran 50 minutes. Got lost in my own neighbourhood. The only thing running through my mind was, whoa, this place has changed. Spend too much time outside that I forgot how beautiful the neighbourhood actually was. Did two laps, so that's roughly 20 minutes each.

Refreshed. Very very energized.

Got the right Ascience thingamajig as well. Finally. Can't believe I blew 30bucks already. GAH! But hey, the upside is that I'll be fit and have nice hair at the same time! Right. Talk about being utterly superficial.

Gonna see if K and her friends are up for beach volleyball or something. But before I shower and everything else, gonna catch Bleach 124. Apparently the DYL crew are gonna wage war tonight. To go, or not to go. But I feel so tempted to play DOTA leh.

Damn it.

the irony

I don't have much to say save for the fact that I need to do something about being punctual and on-time. GRAR!

Discipline. Beginning to lack it already. I am going to go home now and run for a good hour. Oh yeah, now I remember what I needed to get. That strap-thing for my Nano. There is this pair of Asics sneakers that I'm itching to get. But I don't wear sneakers on a regular basis!

Nevermind. No drinks tonight. I want to run and watch Wonder Girls again and contemplate what show to catch tomorrow before my movie vouchers expire. NYAR!

RUN BITCH RUN!

let your troubles fall behind you

I've missed my classmates. I did join Imran, Mike and Joanne for lunch at Suntec (which resulted in me reaching the office at 1400hours when I left at 1130hours. eep!). Fish & Co. Very jelak after awhile.

Life's slowing down, which is a good thing. I haven't had proper rest, the kind where you wake up the next morning feel utterly refreshed. Each day I keep needing to hit the snooze button three times and then drag myself to do some situps and pushups before I'm awake enough to shower. Depressing ain't it?

I'm itching for a late-night/morning run.

You know how it is when you write and you try to find that perfect line, that sums everything up. Without being overly flashy and glittery, just direct. Simple and succint. Straight to the point. Which is what I failed to do at least in this blog. Sivam's and Padhman's words come to mind ( I refuse to admit that Karlie may have said this):

A is for Accuracy.
B is for Brevity.
C is for Clarity.

I try to inject a part of me into the article, maybe I should just stick to reporting, because it seems hella easier as compared to writing features.

Met K and her friends for drinks at Timbre. Her friend was supposedly playing but I didn't stay long enough to check out his keyboard skills. It was a nice night. One of the guys doing the whole boxing thing has this terribly cute smile. I caught some shots of him with the company camera. The boss better not see it. It'd be far too embarrassing for me. Haha.

I guess we judge people too fast and too much. We base our perceptions of others based on what other people tell us. Then again, who's to say the one telling us all of these things are a credible source? I take back my imposed judgement of people before I even get to know them. I've wronged people too much, too subtly in my own head.

Change is the only constant. And now, I need to shower. Because as much as I smell of seduction, I'm all icky from the day's work. Tomorrow, SENTOSA! If only because of some ground-breaking press conference thingamajig. Do I still have to go back to the office after that?

I hope not. It has been shown, I have more inspiration and motivation when I'm at Starbucks sipping on hot cafe mocha and watching eyecandies as I scribble random jibberish on my notepad. Aye.

If only my passion brought me more money. I don't think I'd jump on to another ship so soon. We're at the start of something amazing and incredible. Today's talk with the editor as he sent me to Novena made me re-think my selfish greedy little desires.

Oh well. If all else fails, just find a rich husband lor. HAH!

Somehow, it feels like the weekend already. And technically, I guess it already is.

Wednesday, May 2, 2007

little wonders



Rob Thomas - Little Wonders
let it go,
let it roll right off your shoulder
don't you know
the hardest part is over

let it in,
let your clarity define you
in the end
we will only just remember how it feels


our lives are made
in these small hours
these little wonders,
these twists & turns of fate
time falls away,
but these small hours,
these small hours still remain

let it slide,
let your troubles fall behind you
let it shine
until you feel it all around you
and i don't mind
if it's me you need to turn to
we'll get by,
it's the heart that really matters in the end

our lives are made
in these small hours
these little wonders,
these twists & turns of fate
time falls away,
but these small hours,
these small hours still remain

all of my regret
will wash away some how
but i can not forget
the way i feel right now


in these small hours
these little wonders
these twists & turns of fate
these twists & turns of fate
time falls away but these small hours
these small hours, still remain,
still remain
these little wonders
these twists & turns of fate
time falls away
but these small hours
these little wonders still remain















*

I chose watching Wonder Girls over running. I cannot believe they're about 6 years younger than I am. Wtf. Seriously.

Finally got a hold of some Rachel Yamagata. But hey, Cartel is still on repeat. Nights people. I'm finally sleeping early. Omfg.

way too complicated for my otherwise simple mind

Coffee didn't wake me up.

Spilling coffee onto the floor did. Well, at least it doesn't reek of socks and feet yes? Something more flavourful, intense and unique. Haha. Who am I kidding.

Let's just pray and hope the editor and anyone else doesn't come in and find my little act of folly. It was an accident. I should get myself a mug or some shirt after buying coffee from the coffeeshop nearby. Geh. Really.

Well if there's one thing certain, you can't smell cigarettes on me since I've been trying (in a futile sneaky desperate attempt) to wipe or at least get most of if off the carpet. Now it's the air-con's job to dry it out and blend the colours back seamlessly to one dull maroon/vermillion shade.

At what cost would you pay for a sorta-emergency weekend getaway? Looking at all these plans and the rates and cross-referencing to pictures taken of the place itself. Candid shots show the resort's true colours, never trust what the main website gives you lest you'd be severely disappointed.

Lunch with Imran at Tong Seng. He seems tired and we were both spaced out. He's having lunch with Mike and Joanne at Suntec tomorrow. Would love to join but I'd prolly be outdressed and outclassed and terribly out of place. Plus, the stupid meeting later at night.

In between doing work (plus getting worried about the coffee stain that is still pretty sticky and wet) and looking at all em' pictures, am watching Meet the Robinsons. I guess I'll head home early for a run and then get an early night. I just need to take a break, from a lot of things.

Also, the whole Marvel and Spiderman thing is just too complex and diverse (I mean seriously, how many clones of Spiderman do you wanna make and whatever the hell for? Aren't there other superheroes or part thereof that're more interesting to clone? I'm just a Marvel phillistine) and confuses the heck out of me. Someday, when I have the patience and am sufficiently stoned, I wouldn't mind having someone sit me down and explain to me this web of intricate storylines and plots and everything else to help enlighten me to a Spiderman Nirvana.

Yep.

Now, back to the movie. I feel like having a nice slice of chocolate cake later.

i know it's a wonderful world

Friends to keep are those with whom you can pick up right where you left off even when the lapse in communication and contact could have spanned several days, months, weeks and hell, even years.

Now those are friends.

And it's like the lapse never happened. It's as if you've been seeing each other everyday. You don't ever seem to run out of things to say because you're so random and alike you jump from one train to another.

We humans are very peculiar things. Someday, I'll be able to say everything that's on my mind. My thoughts, my feelings. It's a mixture of happiness and of sadness. Of being content and yet wanting more. Grateful and yet angsty. Everything is a process of evolution, of growth and of maturity.

We never are truly mature. I don't think there is anyone who truly is. Mature that is. As much as my life is going at a pace that's a little too fast at times, I guess I'm glad that things turn out this way. Despite all the bad things, the potholes, the stumbles and the falls.

I know it's a wonderful world.
I can feel it, even if you can't Mister Morrison.
There's someone out there for everyone.
So don't be sad alrights?
It ain't time for me now.
Not yet.

follow me down

You know, as much as this sounds so odd and weird, this actually made me laugh. My best friend just told me that I am fucked up but he still loves me as his best friend. We're all psychotic people on this otherwise fucked up earth. Maybe that's the reason why we exist. Counter-balance to everything else that's been placed here.

I know that I can be cruel, I know that I can be cold. I know my capacity to be vicious, to burn and sting and scar a person. At the same time I know that there are reasons to why I choose to be that way with some people, with certain people. They aren't always easy to express in words, rarely ever. And that's why when it happens, it's too hard to explain why.

Been hanging out with the homies as of late. DOTAing and Spiderman 3 just today (a little disapponted but damn if Harry Osborn isn't cute as hell). I feel happy and at ease hanging out with them. Escapism from the troubles of reality and the complications that I've landed myself in.

You know how everything else is bottled in and you just want to explode like a bad case of Tourette's and lash out, maybe even physically and hell as violently, as you possibly can at all and everyone around you. I feel that way. It would have been a lot worse, these flashes of random madness if not for the fact that my brain's preoccupied with work and the insane dullness of everyday life.

Argh ulcer. You hurt me bad and you hurt me real good. I've been nice to you. Ok, not really. The chocolate tart at Borders Bistro that I shared with the Brother made me really happy. Then I had coffee, heaty as hell, which serves me right for suffering so much now.

I'm not Death. I think I'm Delirium. And I think, that's a bit more dangerous and scary because she's far more unpredictable; winds of change.

Monday, April 30, 2007

they're catching on to us

It's not my fault that I am so very addicted to this song. The lyrics sum up everything that's my life right now.



Cartel - Burn This City
Stay up all night and sleep all day,
We were smart kids with too much to say,
and so, so sure that they were missing out.
They're the ones who are missing out

We were elemental. Talked down to bare essentials.
Who knew we'd get so far?

Cause our days were numbered by nights on too many rooftops.
They said we'd burn so bright.
We burn this city and go.

Play it again, (our games of love and lust.)
There's no such thing (no there's never too much).
And we were so, so sure, oh we never had a doubt.
Now were counting days to getting out.

We were elemental, took down to bare essentials.
Who knew we'd get so far?

Cause our days were numbered by nights on too many rooftops.
They said we're wasting our lives,
Oh at least we know, that if we die - we lived with passion.
They said we'd burn so bright.

We burn this city and go.

Pack our bags and get away - they're catching on to us.
So pack our bags and get away - they're catching on to us.
Pack our bags and get away - they're catching on to us.
Pack our bags and get away - they're catching on to us.

Cause our days were numbered by nights on too many rooftops.
They said we're wasting our lives,
Oh at least we know, that if we die - we lived with passion.
They said we'd burn so bright.
We burn this city, and go.















One article done. Finishing up another. Stumped for the rest. Ulcer is back with a vengeance. Meeting the brother, possibly the turtle and a slew of other people. Then later, HOMEBOYS! I've missed you all and I don't care your reactions whatsoever, I'm snapping as many photos as I can because I'm crazy like that. :D

took to long to let you know

Great. Tonight's meeting got cancelled and pushed to Thursday because they don't have the right attire. Umm yes. So that means no recording and jam this Thursday and I'm hoping to see if the boys can make it on Sunday. Really wanna hear what our songs sound like outside of the studio. Oh well.

Imran made me walk to the DBS at Rochor. Yes, I got paid. The first 200 goes to clearing out bills and debts. Least I know in future how much I owe the telco and can set aside money from there. 400 to last me the rest of the month. I suppose April wasn't too bad although it sucks to be poor. Grar! Anyway, yes. We walked there, he felt guilty making me walk so accompanied me to the bank and then headed back to work. We're seeing bout lunch at Suntec on Wed then maybe we can even get Mike to come down!

Friday's undecided. Imran's unfortunately packed the whole week. Poor guy. Nevermind. He recommended I get the Nike+ shoes since I'm back to running. See how la. I'll save up for that. 177buckaroos yo. Buy that this month and I'll be forced to eat grass for lunch, dinner and everything else. Forget smoking!

Ulcer is feeling better. I just need to hydrate myself on a regular basis. Now all that's left is completing all these half-written articles that I'm stumped with for an ending. Sigh. KL end of May, Phuket in June and where else? I so want to head out of town with a bunch of friends and just chillax and lie on the beach all day long.

Any takers?

this is as disjointed as it gets

Please don't ever buy ballpoint brands that're manufactured by Popular. There's absolutely no calibre and quality. It sucks. The ink doesn't flow smoothly, you've to apply quite a bit of pressure and the colour/stain is just too faint and light for the likes of me.

My editor, has apparently vanished. He came in awhile ago and then left with a plastic bag and the camera. I need to fag, a little desperately. My ulcer and wisdom teeth could possibly be the death of me. I want to sleep. I'm stoned, tired, groggy and completely uninspired. Not only that, I'm out of green tea. Damn. The editor is doing a watch photoshoot downstairs. So I can't sneak out for a fag, he's gonna come back any minute and oh, well, the boxing interview/meeting/whatever it is I managed to push to an earlier timeslot. Thank god.

I feel supremely unmotivated and uninspired. I need coffee and eyecandies to make me happy.

Ok. Imran saved me. My lunch buddy is back and in action. He's selling this off. So if anyone is interested, just let me know. Discounts if you go through me, since he sayangs me many many. :D Awwww.

My throat is about to feel sore, I feel as if I'm about to fall sick. NO AND TOMORROW IS LABOUR DAY DAMN IT! Bah. I'll be damned if I spend my vacation in bed because my body's being a pussy. Tomorrow, I'm going for a late night run. WHOOSH!

Sunday, April 29, 2007

because, i can

They grow, pushing through the layer of pink flesh and making their presence known. So I suffer in silence, muttering and rambling and lisping my way through conversations.



Old songs that used to be a teensy bit depressing, now have new meaning. :D Things aren't that bad after all. Just gotta be more appreciative and thankful for the things I have and for the people in my life.

Time to retire. I predict tomorrow is going to be a long day. A long and excruciatingly boring day. Sigh.

multinational

Dad wants to go on a vacation at the end of May. I've told my mom about the Phuket trip. All's well, green light given for the go. Watching Thank You For Smoking and feeling like lighting up my own lil' stash.

If you argue correctly, you're never wrong.

Who says you don't learn from movies?

I'd talk more but I'm too tired to think beyond work and the desire to fag. Ciao.

cravings and stoned mornings

White wine is so much better than red wine. Lychee martini is alright. Next on the list, let's try chocolate martini! Went drinking with Shar; been eons since we last met up. Hilarious. I got to see the cute barrista boy (of which suddenly I don't really find him as cute anymore). But by the time we went back after meeting up with Grimm and friends, he was gone. Aww. Nevermind.

Have new dress, new shirt, new tanks and new skirt. Me likey likey. Anyway. I'm gonna concuss soon. Shar's bike is freaky la sometimes. 'Crashed' into him at the junction. But it's a sweet ride and it's been awhile since I last rode on a bike. Today at Timber I learnt a couple of interestingly new things which made me go O_o. The first that E's girlfriend now smokes. For two months already.

People change no? Should I keep my hair long or cut it short again? I like it short, fun to play with and everything else. But the hairdresser recommended that I keep it long because it suits my face. Argh, decisions decisions. In any case, bought headbands and hairties. It's beginning to turn into an uncontrollable mess. You know that phase of growing the hair out time? Yeah. Experiencing that.

My week's been booked already. Monday is gonna be a semi-killer. I miss my homeboys. CHRIS YOU FUCKER WHY YOU NEVER PICK UP YOUR PHONE?! I DIDN'T EAT DINNER BECAUSE OF YOU LOR!

Nevermind. Help me lose weight also. HAHA! I'm out of the cereal phase. I'm just craving for Tong Seng's prawn noodles. Slurpdelish!

Also, Shar and I are utter camwhores.