life is about beating people up

For some strange reason, today I went to run at 7 in the morning. Last night after picking up a call, I concussed. My sister said I snored and she was tempted to kick me so that I'd shut up.

Was I really that tired? I don't remember much. It's the kind of sleep that grabs you suddenly and next thing you know you're like omg wtf what happened did someone snatch my body?!

But anyway, that's besides the point. Recently I was on MSN talking to a friend who was having some boy problems. Explained to her the whole concept of playing hard to get and to just ditch the fella if he's being a dumbass since games are pretty much a waste of time when you drag it for too long. Afterwhich, she said that I was an expert at being cold, aloof and detached.

For a moment my brain kinda froze, now was that a good thing or a bad thing? She claims its a compliment. Makes me re-think my current situation. Just recently I was told that I seem to have an emotional toll on a lot of people I meet. I sound like some walking disaster. Hey look, I'm the non-special-ability version of Peter Petrelli. He's pretty cute, in a semi-dorky-geeky-emo kinda way. Grimm says I have a thing for emo boys. Not true! I happen to like sporty athletic and geeky Google-yuppyish kinds as well!

Although I've been having difficulty meeting people from either category.

Now that most of my work's done, I've been handed a new project - designing the brochure/pamphlet for the FIVB. Apart from the fact that it's kinda cool to see 15,000 copies worth of my work in print; I have to face inFuckingDesign again. FUCK!

I have a creative block. I can barely design, barely string coherent literary sentences together and if you want to talk about vocal melody; that's pretty whacked as well. There are those random flashes of inspiration but when I wait for Adobe to load and when it finally does (people, Lin needs to get more memory and more ram), everythings gone. Poof. Just like that. Have you any idea how fucking frustrating that is?

Same goes for photography. I need a portfolio. I need to do fashion editorials. Something. ANYTHING.

Times like these, you feel like finding a punching bag or a deserving little brat and beating the shit out of him. Or her. Whichever. I don't care. I need a vacation. And finally, I can use my burnt weekend to escape to KL with the family.

Somehow, I'm not quite looking forward to it.